Pete: there's a special hell for people who devise expense report policies.

God help you if you use SAP.

Pete Snoo is about to offer to have your babies.

Llodra appears to be the freak to end all freakiness. I might end up liking him yet.

Do the drug enforcement people really have to follow a player around till they get a sample? I hope they have a great 401K plan.

'Drew - you feel my pain, which makes things easier. A little. We use Concur.

MrsSatan - whoops, typo! - it is true that the DC officers must do that. And I'm amazed at how long it takes some of these stud ponies to drive a little liquid through their systems. Now you know why the first thing they do after matches is guzzle water/Gatorade; peeing don't come easy to the dehydrated, and the idea of having some fat dude with a clipboard watching you shower, hug your girlfriend, call your mom etc. etc. is decidedly unappetizing!

As a huge fan of both doubles and free spirited people I want to thank you very much for this post.

Pete I’m keeping track of all these insults via typos. Once the Sampras book drops you are so dead.

That’s a disgusting job. Stay in school children unless you want to end up chasing tennis players for their pee for a living.

Pete - hope you can also have a look at the murray/jj mixed - that looked like a laugh fest as well - and a great press conference. I love it all four focused on winning a senior grand slam title as being important - doubles included.

Llodra - that's the guy who hid naked in Ljubicic's locker as a practical joke, right?

Pete,
Now I'm going to follow Llorda's matches in USOpen. I love when people have fun doing their "jobs".

Being UC officer should be a tough job with certain athletic requirements!

Pete, Thanks for the post! Wonderful to hear about Clement and Llodra's joi de vivre.

It's nice that there are tennis players out there having fun... You know, the original idea of most modern day sports (other than staying in shape). Instead of having to work inside a stuffy office processing expense reports, they get to live the life they really want to. i'd much rather be one of these guys than a Connors, Nadal, Agassi, Federer.

The range of the discussion here has been wonderful the last few weeks... from the poignant (the exhausted Rafa after that monumental final) to the wickedly absurd (so devil may care, those Frenchies!). It's making me look forward to the US Open even more. The themes piece on ESPN captures the essentials of what we can anticipate in the next chapter... so many surprises at Wimbledon, can't wait for summer tennis part two!

Pete: there's a story about Lew Hoad winning the French Open final in 1956 after an all-night session that found him completely drunk when he returned to his hotel the following morning, eight hours before the final. He went for a run, ate breakfast (it didn't stay down), had some help from Rod Laver in working out on an outside court at Roland Garros, ate more breakfast, fell asleep in the locker room - and then won comprehensively in straight sets against Sven Davidson, 6-4, 8-6, 6-1.

He won the Wimbledon final against Ken Rosewall that year as well, but he was sober for that one, having stuck to tea.

Good heavens!!! You are not implying they consorted with . . . girls, are you?

Great report Pete! I was never really into doubles until I got the tennis channel. It's really fun to see singles players who are so dang serious on the court most of the time, smile and enjoy themselves during a doubles match.

MrsSanta - I will win you back when I reveal the book's Scratch 'n Sniff component. . .

those Frenchie's, hehehehe, thats a great story. "Bruno" hehehehe

About the doping control: Rafa relayed a story a while ago that he was home and they came to his house at 9:00 in the morning. His mom had to wake him up, and he said something to the effect that he was glad it was in morning, cause it was easier to give the sample :)

Which leads me to ask...are there people that travel around the world watching professional tennis players pee? The Pee Team?

OK this is an ok topic as long as no one revisits the famous Pee Pee dance - at least until Ms. V Salt posts her version on YouTube

That picture is hilarious--two crazy shirtless guys right next to the stuffy Wimbledon suit.

Boy...back in high school, I remember we had a "B" Team and a "C" Team...but NO ONE was so bad that we relegated them to the "P" Team.

That would be an awful job - I am sure they are those serious almost secret service like types , too
Snoo - I take back everything I said about your liking Llodra - he sounds like a great guy
Too bad they probably did not know about the Animal House connection - when asked his brothers name , Clement could have said
"Eric Stratton, damn glad to meet you"

Well done, Ryan. :)

LOL! Beth, that was brilliant. :) Otter lives forever!

Sherlock - just simply my favorite movie of all time - comedy division

Pete, I once had an 8 month back log of expenses to report, so I feel your pain.

I've been a huge fan of Clement for years and Llodra is just about the most fun thing in tennis, so I'm extremely happy for them.

Pete
thank you for a very interesting post. In addition to the contrast between the shirtless players and the "jacket wearing official", all of the fans are smiling- some broadly. The real appeal to me (in tennis) has always been the entertainment factor -with a closely fought but professionally played match- like the one played by Djoko and Marcos and of course the men's final getting the most points and players having fun on the court.

"Wimbledon Suit" is umpire Lars Graff, by the way. The guy just wants to get his umpire trophy and get the hell away from there.

Thanks, Pete. I LOVE these behind-the-scenes type of stories. I never knew Llodra was such a crack-up. I guess everyone will enjoy this story except for the Bryan brothers, who must be thinking "great, how did we lose to these hungover clowns"??

Jenn,

Llodra hid naked in Ljubicic's locker a couple years ago. Ljubicic went to get his stuff before going out to play a match and found a naked Llodra instead

Mariya - hilarious! I would have paid to see Ljuby's face!
I think I will start following Llodra's career more closely. He should pull a Spadea and give us a book of good stories.

Veruca: One of the things that I love about having TTC is being able to see good doubles matches. I just watched TTC's showing of an old team tennis event (film from HBO Sports) with the Armitraj brothers winning the event for their team with their doubles skills. The players on the two teams included Mayer, Evert, Nastase, Gerulaitis, Wade et al. The stands were packed, and the players seemed to be enjoying themaselves AND playing very good tennis. I didn't remember that they had the multicolored courts back then.

Ruth-that multicolored court is quite something to get used to. Sometimes I wish I was colorblind when I see it.

Tokyo Tom-I'm still working on it. :)

Llodra is No5 in top ten karaokes at the French Open. Funny guy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPh3JCy_l8s

I love these guys!!! Arnaud is especially cute!!
So what if their match preparation methods aren't orthodox or serious? We could say the same about our favorite pair of sisters.

Pete-
I gotta admit, when I first looked at the title of this thread, I thought it was going to be about Andy Roddick.

Arnaud is okay when he's not sneering at ball kids.

UAHAS Llodra was clearly the best in the French Open Karaokes.

It's not even up for debate.

Andrea - gotcha! Big of you to 'fess up, Lucy will be sending your WMB. . .

I would still have to give the best karoake moment to Djokovic. He has so much enthusiasm for his own bare chest. But Llodra's wig and simulated joint puffing was really priceless.

Drinking a magnum of wine is gamesmanship??? To quote somebody famous, "you cannot be serious". It only shows that doubles is a big joke. Even half-drunks can win grand slams in doubles.

JJ is right. Llodra had funk, he had humor, he had star quality. He topped the karaoke.

Ana was the cutest, couldn't stop smiling.

Djoko's was kind of scary.

Rafa had a nice hand twirl.

But the funniest was when Fed came in all eager and goes, "The BEST! ...Yeah!" totally out of sync with the song. Sweet!

Roger is a dork, I think that's well established :)

(and if it wasn't established, he managed to prove it was with the pants incident...)

*hearts Rogi*

Arnaud gets extra style points for the six pack. Nice!

those karaoke things are always funny- no matter how many times you see 'em
Roger is definitely the worst singer - no timing at all - good thing he can play tennis
Llodra and Djoko are the best performers IMO - they just have no shame -
Rafa is just one bad dance move away from the lip bite - you know you have all seen it girls- and guys ,fess up - it happens
still they are all really cute and look like they are having fun - which is the point anyway
can't believe none of them did Like A Virgin - isn't that the gold standard of karaoke?

The gold standard of karaoke is actually Total Eclipse of the Heart.

Let nobody tell you differently.

That is hilarious. How long did the poor official run after him? That's a pretty risky thing to do to the person who has influence over your future -- I love it!

I HAVE to go watch that karaoke vid.

Great post, Pete. Let it never be said that boys-being (frat) boy-culture is only in America! That being said, in this age of polished professionalism, it's great that these guys are just enjoying themselves. I always loved Roddick's quote about how back in the old days he'd hit a bit and go eat a bag of Cheetos, and now that he's trying to be professional and get it done, he just misses his Cheetos.

Errr not only can the Fed not sing...he has absolutely no rhythmn....

Grant - I can see where that would be a good one, too -
but seriously - guys singing Like a Virgin - just should not be dismissed so lightly

Heidi - yep, it is worth a few minutes of your time :)
there are orange food officianados on this website that can relate to the love of Cheetos
that would be a diet staple among a few of our regulars

I love my little frenchies.
Arnaud is a real great guy, and a fighter.
Micka is just a fun guy, so sweat.

An they are going to the masters !!!!
fun, it is going to be :-)

wacky llodra. when i saw the shirt handed down to him i couldn't help but smile. happy happy man. now there's someone who knows what his life is worth indeed. :)

Awesome, Pete! I LOVE the Frenchies. All of them.

"You know, match point on Michael's serve, it's not really a match point (smiling). It's 99% chance to win the point, so it's okay."

Good attitude. Don't you just love Arnaud?

I share the interviewer's suprise that Llodra didn't get naked.

Also, I don't know if it's a gold standard, exactly, but everyone should karaoke "Lola" at least once in their life. I'm not dumb but I can't understand why she walked like a woman and talked like a man...

Copa Cabana?

O Mon Freaking Dieu!!!!

Finalement, some Lllllohhhhdrahhh Lllllove! for anyone who hasn't seen it, the full length, low res, fulsome freak factor microminipants karaoke.

http://tinyurl.com/yrect7

Seriously, this so made my day. Pedro, merci beaucoup!

Ah, Snoo, we've been waiting to live vicariously through your enjoyment of this one...

We're all Llodrakers now.

He so wanted to grab his package in that one...

L-O-L-A , lola - yeah - that is a good one

Thanks a lot ptenisnet! Now I have Copa Cobana stuck in my head! At the Copa, Copa Cabana, music and passion are always the fashion at the Copaaaaaaaa.

I would like to do a karaoke of Edelweiss.

hey. not me. blame/thank lucy.

Who sings that song anyways? I know I should know and now it's turning into one of those questions that really bugs you that you can't remember the answer.

Barry Manilow

please forget that I knew the answer to that question -
It does not help my image as the "cool mom"

Thank you sooo much Beth! The minute I saw that it was Barry Manilow I yelled, "That's it!"

Lucy is talking about a different song, ptenis.

LOLA by the Kinks

OK
I must be crazy to think she doesn't know copa cabana.

In that case, guilty as charged. But I am not ashamed for bringing up Copa Cabana.

ptenisnet - you should be

Haha. Don't be ashamed Ptenis. We all need more music and passion in our lives.

If you karaoke Edelweiss you should always do it in the presence of Nazi party dignitaries, or so the movies would have me believe.

BOth should be mandatory karaoke, Ptenis.

Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, with yellow feathers in her hair and her dress cut down to there
She would merengue and do the cha-cha...
Ok, now it's in MY head

Must take it out with L-O-L-A Lola...

She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a deep brown voice she said Lola
L-O-L-A Lola

Well, I'm not the worlds most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh, my Lola L-O-L-A Lola
Well, I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh, my Lola L-O-L-A Lola

Ok, I will stop now.

BOth should be mandatory karaoke, Ptenis.

Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, with yellow feathers in her hair and her dress cut down to there
She would merengue and do the cha-cha...
Ok, now it's in MY head

Must take it out with L-O-L-A Lola...

She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a deep brown voice she said Lola
L-O-L-A Lola

Well, I'm not the world's most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh, my Lola L-O-L-A Lola
Well, I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh, my Lola L-O-L-A Lola

Ok, I will stop now.

Oops, you got all that twice. Twice the fun, twice the torture

The Nazi dignitaries are there only to look pissed off. That happens often enough when I sing anyway even without the Nazi presence.

My friends used to sing Copa Cabana but with my name instead of Lola.
They thought it was a bloody riot.

ok - now i've got freakin' barry manilow running around my head!

Great the post Pete, nice to know the background on the 'fun' stories. loved that the boys really did know how to have fun. And really, wine's actually from grapes. which is a fruit, (i think). they were just hydrating with vitimen C - sort of!

and yes, i have new found respect for snoo's taste. lllllodra it is - new tw boy toy. (though i do love arnaud for his bandanas, his groovy shades, shirt of many colours and of now his six-pack...!)

PS condolences on the expense reports - alas - if it twere only oracle, i could help you out there....but alas, you're on your own.

oh crap. was it the fabulous fabrice with his shirt of many colours?

PTenis - since you brought up Edelweiss. I've heard today that they slaughtered Federer's cow Juliette (RIP). Apparently, she didn't produce sufficient qualities of milk. No word on her baby calf, whose name is Edelweiss

They both wore that, jb, if we're talking about the same shirt

They didn't off Juliette! Pfft! Like Fed couldn't support her and keep her in grass. Or hay. or whatever cows eat. corn? grains of some sort. say it aint so!

I find that oddly disturbing; definately bad karma.

Is this true about Juliette? If so, it's the beginning of the end for Federer. No wonder he was struggling on grass...

mmmm8 - its got to be, the lacoste rainbow striped shirt? Ever so festive. Could be why i have visions of both of them in it, dancing around to the strains of barry manilow, 'she was a show girl - la la la'...

http://www.gstaadlife.com/2007/07/roger-federers-.html
RIP.

I hear the Gstaad player's party is a barbecue this year (oh, no, she didn't)

LOL, JB. Yeah, that's the one.

It was Lacoste, I think someone else may have worn it too. I just hope Roddick doesn't. He's difficult enough for me to look at as is.

Federer the cow-slaughterer... I'm so disillusioned right now.

that shirt would be so wrong on Roddick - on so many levels
Why did anyone have to bring up Copa Cabana - that is just cruel

Federer didnt know that they offed Juliette.

That was completely unforgiveable that they did that without telling the fed.
That's cute that the calf is named Edelweiss though.

Is this synchronicity?

Right, it does say "Quite oblivious..." etc. Thank goodness for that. But the dastardly deed's been done, poor guy's jinxed anyway.

Thanks for the link to karaoke video; it was too funny.

I have always wanted one of those beautiful headbands that arnaud wears. I imagined they are some great french fabric maker who provides them. I volunteer at the cincy tournament so i hope i will be checking these guys out.

His name was Llodra. He was a llefty. He had nothing left to wear cuz he got naked down to there.
He served and volleyed and won three grand slams
Two with The Magician, one with a-no-ther man
Over Bob and Mike Bry-an...

Now he's not the world's most prettiest guy
but when his freak flag flies I could almost die
for my llodra
l-l-l-l-l-l-oooodraaahhhh

Oy where's Madame H.Pockets when I need her?

looks like you are doing just fine on your own.

Nice, snoo foo, I like how you combined the two songs too :)

Dude. Dude, that is a freaking insane way to make sure the champs come back to defend at gstaad! If you don't come back we'll kill your pets! Man I had it in my head the Swiss were a... I dunno, less vengeful people. Has someone been watching Nanner's copy of Il Padrino? Or another movie? "Gstaad won't be ignored, Roger!"

Maybe this is why El Gato showed up, to save his vaca. Leetle Reeshie, take note. Your cow is safe. For now.

My favourite was the part where Snoo Foo brought the conversation back on topic.

I don't believe the Juliette thing. You don't just slaughter people's cows without asking or even telling them.

Barry Manilow and Sound of Music...so that's what hell is. We must immediately revert to discussing Llodra in hot pants.

I believe Federer knew and fully approved of the cow slaughter. Go Fed!

Is it possible GstaadLife is just the Onion's much subtler Swiss cousin?

That was my suspicion Snoo, but the Tele is reporting it too:

http://tinyurl.com/2yz7uw

Sorry Mods for the diversion, but this is all very distressing.

Is it possible GstaadLife is just the Onion's much subtler Swiss cousin?

I wish Snoo. But it was in other publications also.
I have to admit though, Gstaad doesnt sound like the name of a real place.

I'm with you on Manilow. But you shall not utter a word against Sound Of Music.

Gstaad giveth and Gstaad taketh away?

Sound of Music deserves a worse fate than a Federer owned bovine.

Which doubles team that got a huge fine during Wimby and what did they do exactly?

melo and sa?

they had a shoving match with someone else i think.

Oh my gaad ptenisnet don't make me laugh, I'm trying to mourn.

Whoops, I thought everyone got a cow just for winning Gstaad, meaning by now Spain would be overrun with swiss cows, another strange twist on the bullfighting motif and the cosmic tmf nanner connection.

Man, the saddest part is "I'll do anything for it." Yeah sure Roger. You could have had her airlifted to dubai, set her up with a little grazing pad over the gulf of oman or whatever it is.

The person fined was Benneteau, and it was Melo that he had a shoving/yelling post-match encounter with. His buddies Clement/Llodra got his back though, they beat Melo/Sa in the semis.

or might have been the guys they played. Benneteau and Mahut.

Mrs. Santa, Julien Benneteau solo got fined, like, $5000 us dollars or euros or something, 11,000 australian dollars, it sounded massive, and whatever he said was so bad that Melo and Sa beat him up after the match and nobody cared, the beating was justified, no fines for Melo and Sa, in fact the crowd cheered them on. Man it's always the dorkiest ones who turn out to be cracked.