Are we going to use this for Watercooler topics?

Nonetheless, the woman in the picture Sharapova withdrew from the exhibition against Dulko she had scheduled in Buenos Aires. She cited commercial reasons as the factor leading to her withdrawl.

Sigh. Spam filtered yesterday.

Anyhoo, with apologies to Messrs Cleese and Palin:

[A tennis tactics emporium in London, circa 1970]

TW commenter (hereinafter TWC): S&V is dead!

NP: No it isn't, it's resting! Beautiful plumage, the Norwegian Sampro!

TWC: The plumage don't enter into it, me lad. You assured me, not one half an hour ago, that the only argument against this 'ere style of play was, and I quote, "flimsy evidence and cherry-picked "informed speculation.""

NP: So? What of it? I have a baseball match to watch.

TWC: That malarkey can wait. When I opened up this cage, all I found were some dog-eared YouTube videos and some phoney Stefan Edberg autographs.

NP (defensively): still better than Federer autographs though, squire.

TWC: I'm not interested in the market value of ancient signatures. Where's my bloody S&V?

NP: Well, it would muscle up to the bars and voom through like a rocket if someone as good as Pistol Pete were still around!

TWC: Voom? Voom? This tactic wouldn't voom if you ran 40000 volts through it. It's deceased. It's gone off. It now resides solely in black and white reels and fanciful memories. It's pushing up the daisies of long gone Wimbledon grass. The dodo, saber tooth tiger and trilobite have a greater chance of coming back than S&V.

Lady Diana Spenser, Gawd bless her memory, is more likely to emerge from her mausoleum, flag down a London taxi, enter the gates of Buckingham Palace and prise her former consort from the arms of his current inamorata than this mode of tennis has of making a comeback. It's - a - stiff!

NP (sotto voce): you're just a KAD!

Yes, a fresh conversation about todays personalities and the ATP & WTA tour would be refreshing..........really? Agassi will be the story that will be around for a long time and should be debated in detail. I look forward to the NYT on the topic this weekend and when Agassi starts pimping his book later this month on all the talk shows.

Bali Wednesday Order of Play:

Sabine Lisicki vs Aravane Rezai at 1 AM
Yanina Wickmayer vs Kimiko Date-Krumm
Marion Bartoli vs Magdalena Rybarikova at 5:30 AM
Samantha Stosur vs Agnes Szavay

Andrew: lol :D *thumbs up*

Speaking of withdrawals being down for 2009 in the WTA, Roadmap did help but at those events, some top players were losing earlier than normal. Could this be them playing despite nagging injuries, Roadmap penalities for not making commitment,lack of interest depth of the WTA, or etc...? I am going to say the depth of the WTA is the main reason for this.

Linex,
When did Maria officially w/d? I remember that she and Gisela was going to play exos this month but did not remember the dates.

Hey, everyone. :)

Hm...Seal Face down a set and a break to Mayer; what's happened to him lately? *sad face*

Kohli looks as if he's sorted himself out in Basel, he dropped the first to Chiudinelli in the TB but took the second and is a break up in the third.

LOL, Andrew. :)

Right...I think I will stop cursing Kohlschreiber now, LOL. He's serving to stay in the match.

Not to start a Fedal war, but did anyone notice that photo of them on the ATP main page? Roger holding his finger up signaling "1#" while Rafa glare?

Good stuff.

Chiudinelli takes it! Nice win for him.

Wow.

The organizers of Bali decided to do a gesture for Shahar and had the players release a dove (a sign of peace) at the closing of the opening ceremony.

Well, strike me speechless.

Shahar thanked the organizers and the goverment for helping her with the Visa (who arrived late last week), saying she was happy everything worked out for the best, unlike the Dubai episode, which made her feel very bad.

Chiudinelli played well in Bangkok also, nearly beat Tsonga. Decent player.

Andrew, your satire would've worked better if the irony had been more militant and self-deprecating. Nice try, though.

I was thinking that he'd had some good performances lately.

UNOFFICIAL 2008 Top 10 WTA players bonus compensation including their 2 700 commitment

1. Jelena - 1,000,000
2. Serena - 300,000
3. Dinara - 700,000
4. Elena - 450,000
5. Ana - 200,000
6. Venus - 200,000
7. Vera - 100,000
8. Svetlana - 225,000
9. Maria - 0
10. Agnieszka - 250,000

Also, marquee players get 25 K if they make their 2 Premier 700 commitments but I do not know who they are

**************************************************
2008 Top 10 WTA players bonus compensation including their 2 700 commitment per SEWTA website as of 11/02/09 under Notes and Netcords

1. Jelena - 1,000,000
2. Serena - 325,000
3. Dinara - 700,000
4. Elena - 462,500
5. Ana - 200,000
6. Venus - 250,000
7. Vera - 100,000
8. Svetlana - 225,000
9. Maria - 25,000
10. Agnieszka - 262,500
Marquee. Marion - 37,500

Top half of post is what I thought their bonus portion would be. Bottom half is their actually bonus portion if I calculated correctly. If you want to know how the players earned their bonuses(per my calculations), I will detail upon request.

Chiudinelli is on somewhat on a roll. How is he on clay? Assuming Stan's wife isn't of the Mirka variety (Lets go and watch my husband playing a high-stress match while I'm about to pop out a kid) and Stan won't play DC - they need a second player, if Roger opts to play.

Performances? eek. I think I have been watching too much X Factor.

Personally, I completely failed to grasp any of it.

NP, I had a bet with myself that you'd come in with "Monty Python is overrated." Good thing it was only with myself...LOL.

Andrew
That's darn good mate.
Go for it.
S&V...Shmuck & Volley...play creatively is what I have to say. If you have to volley, volley. Just don't come rushing to the net, willy-nilly, just because someone tossed a ball at you to serve (now say that in the Holy Grail tone - "just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me"..)

Hi everyone. I have been out of the loop. But I saw someone mention Pistol Pete (satire), and that NP, and other nice people were here too. I need to catch up on all the Non-Andre-related tennis matters, and get back on here with you guys.

"She turned me into a S&V'er!!!... Wull...I got better..."

j, Monty Python is overrated.

Andrew, lol, good start for my day:-)

Right you are, jewell and NP

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/bristol/somerset/3507439.stm

And this is back from the time where S&V was "in".

Andrew, thank you for the laughs!

Andrew, thank you for the laughs.

NP and jewell, you were right:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/bristol/somerset/3507439.stm

And this is from the time when S&V was "IN".

Yay for Marco.

Poor Haasi. The guy just cannot catch a break.

French Open may be moving from Roland Garros:

http://tinyurl.com/y9k6vb6

10 minutes for a post!. Typepad deserves this from Monty Python:

"We are no longer the knights who say ni! We are now the knights who say ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing!”

BlueDog sighting! *loves*

Almagro and Ferrer seem to be having a bit of a battle.

Top 15 Greatest Tennis Records:

http://thepulplist.com/2009/10/top-15-greatest-tennis-records/

Oh - I don't know whether Monty Python is over-rated or not; I was just teasing NP...probably a grave error for which I shall certainly pay. ;-)

Interesting about medieval vs. Renaissance though. I think I have a book about medieval times by Terry Jones actually - hm, maybe will read that next, I need something to read.

Ferrer serving for the match at 5-2 up in the third. I like Ferrer, but I wish Almagro could string some matches together.

Hi Jewell *loves back*

NP- Being a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10 is overrated.

Did that exo with Sharapova fall apart? I remember Kournikova used to play those. Wasn't teret a Tennis magazine article about Anna Kournikova in South America?

I guess there weren't enough tickets sold or a sponsor pulled out for this one.

BlueDog, being a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10 in hand placement is definitely not overrated.

You could just make 10 louder, but going to 11 is never overrated.

You use both hands? Wow!

Grant- That's the Nigel scale. Whole different thing!

Andrew - Parroting S&V wasn't spammed filtered last night. It was there in last night's thread. And it was and is today, wonderful. Twice as good the second time around.

BTW -did you see the 6 part Python documentary on the Independent Film Channel last month - "The Lawyers' Cut" ? Prolly for hard core Pythonistas only, but some fascinating and funny stuff.

NP - the fact that you think Monty Python is "overrated" explains SO much. Thanks for the insight.

Good win for ChiChi in Basel. He and Fed are playing dubs, which should be fun...for them and Fed fans anyway. Why hasn't the Djoker played yet? If he doesn't start til tomorrow he won't get any days off if he goes through??

Alexis : That's a brilliant list, really enjoyed reading that. Though I think Sampras's Wimbledon record and total number of weeks at #1 is slightly more impressive than his 6 consecutive seasons ending #1.

CL,
Novak plays at 2 PM EST today.

Can someone tell me the name of the new Baby Fed. I can't for anything remember that boy's name.

jewell - Terry Jones wrote a book about a section from Canterbury Tales - the Knight's Tale, I think. He was trying to suss out the humour from the lines and why is was funny then and maybe, in translation, not funny now.

MA -thanks...he isn't on the live score...I'll go back and check, though.

NineOfNine: Are you wondering about Grigor Dimitrov?

Wednesday Order of Play

Basel with Roger at 2:00 PM
http://tinyurl.com/y9q2de3

Tennis Channel will replay a match starting at 7 PM

Valencia with Fernando Verdasco returning to action
http://tinyurl.com/yj7vudv

Master Ace...ah.. I see it now on the live scores page...below the dubs.

Bhai Mirzai, that's the one. Thanks

CL, there was no "insight," only inside humor. Thanks for the shout-out.

jewell,

I met Terry Jones and Michael Palin when they were promoting the film "Life of Brian" back in 1979. I was most impressed by Terry. 30 years ago he was so serious already and talking about History the whole time. He studied at Oxford (English?) but History was his passion. Michael was a clown then, I suppose only to promote the film. I love "Monthy Python"!.

Alexis: Good list.

By the way, who has the most GS finals among men? Federer has 19 now. Correct?

A streak of 22 (and counting) GS semifinals is great. It is also an amazing fact that no one in those 22 GS has been able to win it without beating Federer first (three times in SF, and 4 times in the Finals).

zenggi- You have made me truly envious! Python are the GOAT!! Hmmm, new war possibility.

Fabulousness, zenggi. :)

Can't remember what usually opposes Python...there must be a comedy GOAT discussion out there somewhere...*contemplates looking*

Fun list, Alexis. I love that picture of Mac at the top. :)

JCF looks in control against Cuevas at the moment. Also have Roger and Marco up on the SB but not started yet.

BlueDog,

I'm quite proud of that part of my (young) life too. On the other hand, I've met a lot of jerks while doing my job at the time.

About GOAT's wars. This is Monty Python's opinion. Substitute King by GOAT.

"He must be a king.
Why?
He hasn't got s@#$ all over him.”

zenggi - me jealous too! The only reason I know that bit about Terry Jones and his book was because we were watching Life of Brian the other night and there was a BBC docu filmed on set in Tunisia as part of the package, and he talked a bit about the book. I was at a party once with Eric Idle in London and was so nervous I didn't dare say anything to him. Very unusual for me...lol.

In that recent 6 part documentary is was very interesting seeing how they had all aged and changed. Overall they seemed to be holding up pretty well, but somehow, of all of them, it was Michael Palin who seemed to have lost his 'spark.' Don't know how to explain it exactly, but all the others, (Except, obviously, for the deceased Graham Chapman, he of the "choir invisible" ), just seemed like older versions of their silly selves, but Michael kind of seemed 'deflated' somehow. Still, overall, it was great fun to watch and to hear their memories and insights. Funny thing is, as a work unit, they were incredibly efficient, but outside of work, I don't think that had a clue about each other. Probably for the best.

NP - you are entirely welcome.

Alexis...thanks..for the list. I was wondering where the 22 SF streak was going to be ranked.

The writer did not mention it, but among the current players..only Verdasco has won 1 match in slams 21 consecutive times (from a discussion at ESPN). Nobody has even won two matches 22 consecutive times in slams.

Roger has won 5 matches 22 consecutive times in slams.

Its good to see it getting attention. Otherwise mostly the all-time slams (15) usually gets all the attention. But this is more mind-boggling IMO.

Thanks Pete,

LOL Andrew!!!

That made my morning.

Good morning everyone.

Program Note: Federer doubles match here http://www.fromsport.com/video-107147.html

CL: I didn't think Terry Jones was saying Chaucer's description of the Knight in the Prologue to Canterbury was supposed to be funny (it isn't, although Chaucer does take sly digs at some of the other characters in the Prologue). I thought Jones was explaining what first drew him to study the Middle Ages--the fact that its values were so different from those of our own age.

Tx for the link, Jamaica Karen. Do you have ac now?

And Roger DFs.

*sigh*

And Federer serves his team out of trouble. Interesting experience seeing him in doubles.

Bad JCF...broken while serving for the match. Cuevas seems to have been fighting back in this set, think that's twice he's come back from a break down.

Thank you, jewell and CL. I've just realized that I'm talking about a century ago!. Funny to remember how sharp and quick-witted both were. I could go on for ever..

Back to tennis and watching Roger-Marco against Cerretani J./Qureshi A.-U.-H. (Never heard of them).

jhurwi - huh..interesting...I took it as that the humour within the Knight's Tale was actually what he was writing about for his book...but you may be well right, that it was a jumping off place for a broader interest.

Robbie gives Roger only three more singles majors. Remember that when we clock round to 19 ...

Safin and Grosjean have been given w/cards for the Paris Masters.

The French tennis Federation said Teusday that Michael Llodra r/u to Ljubicic at the Lyon Grand Prix has also been given a w/c.

"Assuming Stan's wife isn't of the Mirka variety (Lets go and watch my husband playing a high-stress match while I'm about to pop out a kid)"

Hee hee! I think, however, that concubines are more adept at dealing with stress than are wives.

Does getting hit by a tennis ball really hurt that much? I remember a Lendl-McEnroe video where Mac stayed down for nearly a minute after Lendl went down the middle with the passing shot.

And Roger gets hit...its good he has already had kids.

after getting pegged with that ball, did anyone notice that Fed did a shadow TWO HANDED backhand?

VC Bloody Oath it does lol!

Especially at net play in doubles.

depends where it hits you, VC :-)

Very bad JCF, loses the second on a TB.

CL: The Knight doesn't tell a humorous tale but a serious chivalric romance, the story of Arcite and Palamon: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Knight's_Tale

"And Roger gets hit...its good he has already had kids. "

"depends where it hits you, VC :-)"

Heh, I was expecting a series of answers along those lines...

Swiss boys lose the first set, this hasn't been the most convincing argument for Federer's volleying prowess so far. :-)

Jewell Your watching Valencia right? who is he playing

Even Roger can have a bad day at the volleying office

Hmmm...Fed/Chi may not make it. Just lost the first set.

I'm not watching, just SB-ing, but I think atdhe has a stream.

Playing Pablo Cuevas...JCF was 6-2 and 5-2 up. *shakes head*

Hi AM,

"Volleying office" is closed for good, remember?

There are no "good days" anymore.

Cerretani and Qureshi look a much better team so far.

Hi Zenggi I missed you earlier

methinks you been hanging around NP for too long with that statement lol!

Damn, I missed Monty Python *and* Nigel Tufnel.
I'm never hear for the stuff that really matters.:P

I'm also never *here* for the stuff that matters...

Hee, didn't one of these guys win a gold medal in doubles?

I'm not sure he's quite awake today.

Maybe he was up all night with the twins

JCF is now 1-4 down in the third...

Tommy Haas has contracted Swine Flu,poor guy.

Federer can barely get a return back in play today.

Hi AM,

I've missed you too.

NP doesn't need friends or foes.

Nick Lester is a complete doofus

Gee Jewell that is a upset in the making

http://www.justin.tv/amex400/popout

Chi/Fed v. Cer/Qur: This works well with periodic refreshing. English commentary with loverly British accents;)).

Staying the background today; hope everyone has a good day/eve.

http://www.justin.tv/amex400/popout

Chi/Fed v. Cer/Qur: This works well with periodic refreshing. English commentary with loverly British accents;)).

Staying the background today; hope everyone has a good day/eve.

JohnC Yes I agree,he is still commentating with Robbie

Ok where is my Douggie?

Roger is sleeping.

Man, these guys are really good (Cerretani/Qureshi). I know Qureshi is a good doubles player but never heard of Cerretani before.

Three BPs on Federer's serve, apparently he's irritated about something. Perhaps with getting outplayed. :-)

shoud be "staying in" the background;))